When parenthood becomes a mirror: discovering your own ferrari brain

"Mom/Dad, why do you always forget your keys too?" That simple question from my child was the moment everything clicked. While I was busy understanding and embracing their neurodivergent traits, I suddenly found myself looking into a mirror I had avoided for years.

Parenthood has a unique way of confronting us with ourselves. For many parents, the moment they help their child navigate neurodivergence becomes the moment they begin recognizing their own Ferrari brain.

The signs you may have been ignoring for years

As a therapist, I see it regularly: parents who come in for their child and slowly realize they recognize traits in themselves too. Perhaps you recognize these signals:

You've always known you were different

• You felt different at school but could never name it

• Strategies that worked for others didn't work for you

• You've always struggled more with organization or focus than others

You recognize yourself in your child

• Their outbursts remind you of your own emotional intensity

• Their way of thinking feels familiar

• You understand their behavior on a level others don't seem to grasp

Your coping mechanisms become visible

• You realize you've spent years developing strategies to "mask"

• Situations others handle easily drain you disproportionately

• You've always felt you had to work harder to achieve the same results

Recognizing the Ferrari brain as an adult

Your Ferrari brain may have been running at half capacity for years because you didn't know how to steer it. As an adult, neurodivergence can look different:

At work:

• Hyperfocus periods followed by complete exhaustion

• Difficulty prioritizing and meeting deadlines

• Creative solutions that amaze others, but inconsistent performance

In relationships:

• Intense emotions that are hard to regulate

• Difficulty with social cues or unwritten rules

• Deep, meaningful connections but exhaustion from social interactions

In daily life:

• Forgetfulness with routine tasks

• Overwhelm from too many stimuli

• Periods of high productivity alternating with complete shutdown

The power of late recognition

Discovering your neurodivergence as an adult isn't too late—it's exactly on time. This recognition brings:

Self-compassion: 

Finally understanding why certain things were always difficult

Better strategies: 

You can now consciously choose approaches that suit your Ferrari brain

Authentic parenting: 

You can help your children without neglecting your own needs

Connection: 

You understand your child on a deeper level because you share their experience

Practical steps for your discovery journey

1. Start with self-observation

Track for a week when you feel energetic versus when you're drained. What patterns do you see?

2. Educate yourself

Read about different forms of neurodivergence. Not to self-diagnose, but to find language for your experiences.

3. Seek professional support

A diagnosis can bring clarity, but even without formal diagnosis, you can develop strategies that work.

4. Connect with others

Find communities of neurodivergent adults. You're not alone in this discovery.

5. Redefine success

Let go of traditional expectations and define success your way, with your Ferrari brain.

Giving your children an authentic example

By embracing your own neurodivergence, you give your children the most beautiful gift: a parent who is authentic and shows that being different doesn't mean being less. You demonstrate that their Ferrari brain isn't something to hide, but something to celebrate and understand.

When you stop masking and start embracing, you create a safe space where your entire family can flourish.